That could be the ideal description of Ashley Madison. It seems almost ironic, at least in the common vernacular usage of the term irony that while more and more online dating sites geared towards long-term relationships bar married folks from joining that at least one site makes no bones about the fact that most of its members are only feeling alone in the figurative sense.

I find it slightly highhanded that some web personals go so far as to offer background checks on potential dates. One I signed up for, it threatens litigation if someone who isn’t unattached tries to woo its unsuspecting single subscribers. It was a bit heavy duty for me to read among the important sound legalese, adulterers being guilty of fraud, not just some less tangible betrayal. They said marriage is a contract after all.

I think currently, we’re all grownups, so it’s a little bit silly for me to think that some big brother webmaster needs to hold my hand when it comes to choosing who is appropriate to date. In a sense though, again using the word in its misappropriated manner, it’s ironic to realize that a site designed for “cheaters” to meet one another might just be the most honest place out there to meet someone.

I always found that the problem with dating anyone who isn’t single extends mostly to your ability to remain completely detached from the situation yourself. The person in the marriage is the one who has the most to lose, so he or she is dealing with some complex emotions that you on the outside might be able to avoid, if you don’t get sucked into the drama.

I think the most obvious thing to remember from the individuals I’ve known who have been dating a married man is that if they break off their marital relationship, they won’t be settling down right away with you. I knew one single woman moved in with a married guy before his divorce was fully finalized. Once the paperwork cleared, he dumped said mistress as the novelty of being free from the legal commitment of a marriage made him feel he should find someone completely new that hadn’t lived through the baggage-creating breakup process with him.

As far as dating a married woman though, I have fewer stories in mind, but I do have one twice-married gal pal from high school who became pregnant by her lover while still with her first husband. She consequently divorced husband number one and married the boyfriend. They are now a happy family of five. To strive for love is hard, but they say it’s blind, so no wonder we stumble along the way. Whatever works I guess.

(original article)